October 2023

Let me know if any part of this conversation sounds familiar to you:

“What do you want for dinner tonight?” says person #1

“I don’t care, what do you want?” responds person #2

“What do you want to do tonight?” says person #1

“Doesn’t matter to me. What do you want to do?” responds person #2

It’s the everyday conversations with your spouse or partner to decide the trivial things. Dinner, activities, what to watch on TV, things that can be important but not life changing. If only you are making these decisions, maybe it’s not such a big deal. You’re the only one you need to discuss things with. When another person (or more) become involved, things might get a little more complicated.

Maybe the day-to-day decisions aren’t the most challenging ones to agree on, but how about when it comes to the big decisions surrounding retirement. When to retire? Where do you want to live in retirement? What do you want to do in retirement? How do you plan to pay for retirement? What happens if one of us isn’t around for retirement?

You may be surprised to find out that there are many folks looking to retire or who are already in retirement that have not had this conversation with their spouse or partner. It is good to be on the same page because having different ideas of what retirement looks like can lead to difficulty in planning for the best outcome. Now, if you are just planning for you, things do get a little simpler. However, what about medical decisions, legacy gifting, or end of life preferences? These are topics to discuss with that important person who will be helping you with your affairs if you are no longer able or after you are gone.

When you begin your conversation, it might feel like your retirement pictures looks quite different from each other. That is OK. While you aren’t trying to compromise your dreams or negotiate into a life you don’t want, its good to come to an understanding of what you both expect and what life looks like in this next season. What you don’t want are rigid attitudes and lack of understanding of each other’s needs. Just as it is equally important for a person making decisions on their own to make sure their vision of their life is understood by those helping them or carrying out wishes down the road.

Living in and planning for retirement is a big deal. There are many questions we have for you for this stage of life. Remember, retirement is more than just stopping work. It includes figuring out what is next too, including, for your investments, your life, your home and your well-being. Let’s begin planning for you.