Family Banquet

“Everybody, sooner or later, sits down to a banquet of consequences.” ~ Robert Louis Stevenson

Question: Our family will be together for Thanksgiving, and I’d like to use this opportunity to have a casual family financial meeting. What recommendations might you have?

Answer: Hopefully, your banquet will be filled with delightful discussion and shared experiences of how hard work, discipline and strategic planning is providing your family with pleasant outcomes.

Passing down family values may be as important as passing along family wealth to the next generation. This is a time to talk about history as well as wealth management. One of the best ways to prepare is by hosting a family meeting to have an open and honest conversation about your family’s unique situation, needs and goals. Here’s a guide to get you started.

When and where should you meet?

If you and your loved ones live will be together for several days over the Thanksgiving holiday, it may be as easy as inviting them over for an extended dinner the day after Thanksgiving. Consider where everyone would feel most comfortable, and if spouses and children will be part of the conversation, or it could be a special dessert discussion with key family members. We occasionally host family meetings in our office or in a private dining room if you’d like to include your CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™ professional, or other financial professionals using a neutral professional setting and utilizing an objective moderator to put everyone at ease.

If the timing isn’t right for a full discussion over this holiday weekend, you may want to introduce the concept and schedule a video conference call or reconvene at a specific time for a reunion or vacation to talk about the future and your wishes.

Who should attend? This depends on what you plan to discuss. Very personal matters may need to be addressed with immediate family first. Eventually, you may want to invite in-laws and grandchildren into the conversation; then include your professional advisors to help you act on follow-up items. Sensitive subjects should be broached carefully to build consensus among decision-makers.

As you invite the relevant players to the table, consider what role they’ll play. Is one more financially savvy, one the family historian, one more responsible than others? You may want to assign a different person to communicate with the family attorney, accountant, or trustee; to update your financial advisor; to spearhead the family’s philanthropic endeavors; and to serve as the family educator. Capitalize on each person’s skill set to keep the lines of communication open, lend a sense of accountability and keep everyone engaged during the meetings. You can always switch up the roles so no one feels burdened or left out. Consider assigning a family secretary to keep track of action items and to document what decisions were made.

What should you talk about? There’s a wide range of topics you may wish to cover with your family. Some may be harder to talk about than others, but that just means they’re that much more important. Here are a few ideas to get the conversation flowing:

• Gratitude and Purpose: Many families value hard work and integrity as antidotes to a sense of entitlement. Share stories of gratitude and accomplishments.
• Intentions for your family wealth. Develop a mission statement so everyone knows what values you’d like to promote through philanthropic endeavors. A Donor Advised Fund for a Family Foundation may be appropriate. This can be started with as little as $25,000.00.
• The value of higher education. Family support can help the next generation reach their educational goals.
• Business plans. If you’re a business owner, have you planned for the succession of your business once you retire? How might your family or children play a role in that transition?
• Health, mobility, and caregiving concerns. These serious matters should be addressed before they become an issue. Who will take care of whom, and for how long? Where will you live? What renovations may need to be made? Share your wishes and listen to each other as you navigate this topic.
• Points of transition. Family changes affect the conversation. How do you want to address survivors or changes in beneficiaries after births, marriages, or divorces? What about inheritances for children, stepchildren, or half-siblings? While these discussions can be uncomfortable, it’s important to talk through them together and decide what makes the most sense for your family and the “what ifs.”

When should you reconvene? Depending on how things go, you may need one or two longer meetings, followed by shorter gatherings semiannually or annually. Or perhaps you’d prefer more casual but regular conversations held monthly or bimonthly. After your initial conversation, you’ll be better able to gauge what works best for you and your loved ones. Stay focused and plan accordingly.

The opinions expressed are those of the writer as of November 14, 2022, but not necessarily those of Raymond James and Associates, and subject to change at any time based on market conditions and other factors. Raymond James financial advisors do not render advice on tax or legal matters. You should discuss any tax or legal matters with the appropriate professional.

Donors are urged to consult their attorneys, accountants, or tax advisors with respect to questions relating to the deductibility of various types of contributions to a Donor-Advised Fund for federal and state tax purposes. To learn more about the potential risks and benefits of Donor Advised Funds, please contact us.

“Certified Financial Planner Board of Standards Inc. owns the certification marks CFP®, CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™, CFP® (with plaque design) and CFP® (with flame design) in the U.S., which it awards to individuals who successfully complete CFP Board’s initial and ongoing certification requirements.” This article provided by Darcie Guerin, CFP®, First Vice President, Investments & Branch Manager of Raymond James & Associates, Inc. Member New York Stock Exchange/SIPC 606 Bald Eagle Dr. Suite 401, Marco Island, FL 34145. She may be reached at (239)389-1041, email darcie.guerin@raymondjames.com Website: www.raymondjames.com/Darcie